seriously, i tried many times sitting down n blog.

but somehow.. i jus clear everything away, close the window n went n do other stuff.

i wonder if the way of expressing myself has got worse.

or mayb life's a bit mundane now.. nth reli special is happening.. except, well, its the holidays.

i've got my attachment alr.. Aztech company.. not the china one of cos.

hais.. wanted to go GIP or sth. somewhere tts out of town. i guess my results wont allow me to, and my financial status as well. i was planning to take the 3 months attachment instead of this 6 mths..but before i cld make up my mind n decide, i was given the Aztech company.

i guess i suck big time at decision making. i'll procrastinate n procrastinate until someone decide it for me. it has happened far too many times. i noe i will falter even after the decision is made.. useless me.

many times.. i was forced to accept the decision made by others.

mayb it was my indecisiveness, wishy-washyness, non-persistence, or watever it was.

i know i cannot make it... and i'm working hard on it. i am.

i was talking to aug some days ago..

n we mentioned how each of us changed since the first time we noe each other.. which was like 3 yrs ago. n oOooOo~ how time flies. i'm glad tt i noe certain ppl along the way who helped me so much n always being there for me.i dont mind being a rubbish bin.. tts how she says i am. i dont mind letting her rattling on n on abt her life, abt her probs, simply abt every part of her life tt i've missed. she had seen me gg frm the peak of my life to sinking down to the bottom.. yes, the life's rollercoaster curve will b gg up soon enuf..i cant possibly stay stuck at the bottom. i still am who i was..but mayb grown a little stronger n self-defensive.

i am feeling emotionless.

its the time i'll live for myself..

but.. there's sth yet to b done.