Photobucket

- the words -

Photobucket
- the wants -

+ hula hoop
+ braces
+ SKII Facial Treatment Essence
+ (SKII) Toner & Moisturiser
+ (DKNY) Watch
+ camera phone

- the chatters -
























- the lovelies -

- the past -


- now playing -


im turning back to blogging again.


Writing is a way which i think i can remind myself to think positive. its a wonder how i always fall apart and go into withdrawal mode. Though i understand the need to be patient and put in effort... the environment just somehow swallows me and puts me into a dark tunnel with no light. The inferior self sets in and everything seem impossible. the dreams, the plans, the future.. turns to a bleak.

there was so much in me that i wish to express, and more often than not, i chose to hide, escape and run away. i used to think that i've become more independent than before, more adventurous than who i was 5 years ago. Indeed, the journey thus far was full of learning and self realisation. i cannot stop and will not stop chasing the dream. i accept your criticisms because i know you want me to be better.

"if you want to change someone, you have to first change yourself." Remind me, if i'm falling short of expectation. Praise me when I have done the mark. I strive to pursue my dream. To the future, cheers.






mumbling on
Monday, February 20, 2012 at 10:18 PM

Gone with 2011, its the new year again

i haven't been blogging, for like almost a year.

I took this chance to stay at home on the last day of 2011 to reflect upon this special year. The thing I want to change, remains. My 2011 resolution didnt work out. (shit) Honestly, i've grown into my comfort zone, and thats deadly. Perhaps i'm generally satisfied, took a step back and the big picture is still rather pretty.

There were many instances that I kept reminding myself to be proactive, to be motivated. But that part of me seems to be disintegrating away. I shall learn not to be overly-dependent and have the "watch how it goes" attitude. I need a change.

2011 was a year on fast-forward mode. The days and months zoomed past. Got a flat, got a car, and what's next? It was a year of which i feel that i've grown old. That someday, i may be someone's wife, have a house of my own, and embrace another new family. I can never be the parents' kid anymore. A bigger responsibility waiting ahead. That makes my stomach churns.

Anyhoo, I shall take on whatever challenge that is install for me, and make it better! Stay positive! Happy 2012 to all! :D



mumbling on
Saturday, December 31, 2011 at 9:09 PM



有人告诉过我说

当可以把流到眼角的泪吞回肚里时， 那就是坚强。




可悲。


mumbling on
Friday, March 25, 2011 at 11:40 PM



i can't believe i've fallen once again, to the anxiety and tears and uncertainties ahead. Being the usual inconfidence and pessimistic self, I've sunk and struggled so hard to survive.

I was hiding in my shell and comfort zone, so long that the goals were fogged and determinations gone. It was at the trough that I finally decided, to look further and beyond what ahead lies.


mumbling on
Saturday, January 15, 2011 at 1:17 PM

='(

have you ever been upset with yourself? you just feel like kicking yourself hard so that all fantasy bubbles get popped and you'll wake up to reality?

*screams*




mumbling on
Monday, January 10, 2011 at 11:30 PM

2011, new year new challenges?

wow. its been another year, and boy, 2010 was a blast.

a decision probably affected how my year had worked out. All along, I have been constantly doubting on the ability of finding "the one". I dont know how, dont know why, but somehow he managed to surpass the fortress and came into my life. Talk about the knight in shining armour -_- Anyhoo, it was a big step forward and this relationship did bring many surprises and pockets of joy in my life. I might have loved someone with all my heart, might have pursued a love that will never return, might have cried my eyes out and lived in denial. But in 2010, I finally put it all behind me and started on a fresh page -- simply b'cos, we all moved on.

It's amazing how things fall into place. He might not be the perfect guy, might not be the perfect love, or might not even be "the one". For the unexplainable comfort we found in each other, thats enough. Now, I do understand the meaning of "companionship". Truely.

It was an eventful 2010. Malacca road trip, Phuket, Bali, Bangkok, USA and omg, Grand Canyon! So much to see, so much to experience. Its bad for the wallet, but good for the heart, mind and soul! And Sis' tied the knot in August! I'm happy she found herself someone whom she can entrust her future to =) must be shiok to be a tai tai. =p OH OH! and i finally did braces too!

Hiccups in life are usual i guess. Some worth the effort to make corrections, some actually... not. There are bound to have disappointments and period of setbacks. i know that I can't please everyone in the world. So don't expect me to be the goody yes-girl like before.

I'm not going to do any new year resolutions for 2011, cos plans change with decisions made. I only need 1 firm decision. Give me the light and courage.. I will take up this new challenge.


mumbling on
Saturday, December 11, 2010 at 12:19 AM

Living in a Dream


I was at California-Nevada-Arizona for 10 days.
The amount of memories and experiences are beyond words.

First stop was at Fresno - Yosemite National Park.
Snow-capped mountains, waterfalls, falling maple leaves. I think I've walked into a picture.


San Francisco.
I love the architecture of the buildings and the old-fashioned trams and railway buses.


Las Vegas.
I finally know why it has a name of Sin City. With slot machines even in the airport and 7-11, it was irresistible to cash in your 1 buck for a gamble of luck. Statue of Liberty, Pyramid of Egypt, Eiffel Tower of Paris.. its 10 x of Universal Studio.


Grand Canyon.
A day trip to one of the 7 natural wonders in the world. Breathtaking.


The past 10 days felt like a dream.
And now that I've woken, its back to reality.


mumbling on
Sunday, November 21, 2010 at 8:29 PM

no pain, no gain?

i'm in an irritable mood.

there is pain from the braces. every single teeth just hurts like hell. it feels like all my teeth are falling off. i cant bite, i cant chew, and i'm darn hungry now. argh.

i dont know what i'm getting myself into, seriously.

it just feels wrong. having to be the thing that i wanted.. my life long goal. from the 7 extractions of teeth to putting on the braces, its just pain, pain and MORE pain. i wanted so much to take a plier and cut off those wires now. really.

obviously, its my choice. no matter how much i complain, it is still going to stay with me for the next 2 years. *cries*


mumbling on
Sunday, October 10, 2010 at 12:16 AM